She was the kind of person, despite what she thought, who never really knew what love was.
How could she? Her heart was dark and her mind twisted, hardened by years of trauma and trying to lock away her feelings away.
But I am too sensitive for my own good. I always want to be the knight in shining armor. Always. No matter the cost. I'm going to help her find herself again. I'm going to teach her how beautiful the world can be... how beautiful it has been.
I always fall in love with the girl in pain.
I propped myself onto my elbow, slowly, careful not to rustle the sheets. I wanted to get a look at her, asleep, the only time she's peaceful, her face shining in the moonlight. Her breathing was slow and even, steady and constant. You couldn’t see the white scars on her porcelain skin here, in the darkness. Her hair hung on her face, moving as she breathed, and I gently pushed it away off her skin. Her eyes were closed, her long, brown eyelashes barely fluttering. Her lips were pink and chapped, looking different without the usual small layer of lip gloss. The few little freckles and pimples she usually covered were plain and visible. She somehow looked even more beautiful when they were visible. She looked perfect.
I propped myself onto my elbow, slowly, careful not to rustle the sheets. I wanted to get a look at her, asleep, the only time she's peaceful, her face shining in the moonlight. Her breathing was slow and even, steady and constant. You couldn’t see the white scars on her porcelain skin here, in the darkness. Her hair hung on her face, moving as she breathed, and I gently pushed it away off her skin. Her eyes were closed, her long, brown eyelashes barely fluttering. Her lips were pink and chapped, looking different without the usual small layer of lip gloss. The few little freckles and pimples she usually covered were plain and visible. She somehow looked even more beautiful when they were visible. She looked perfect.
I slowly moved the covers off of me and climbed out of bed, then pulled them gently back over her. She shivered briefly, and I paused, scared of being caught, but she just turned over and kept sleeping. I walked quietly to the window and opened the blinds. The glass was dirty, but it didn’t stop me from seeing the moonlight on the fresh fallen snow. The whole world was a blanket of white peace, a sight that never failed to impress me.
“Gwen,” I breathed, scared to shatter the silence. “Gwen, look at this.” I looked back at the bed, where she lay, still asleep. I walked over and kissed her forehead. She smiled in her sleep and then slowly opened her eyes.
“Is it already morning?” She whispered.
“Not yet, love. Come see this, and then we’ll go back to bed.” She sighed, but I could tell she was trying not to smile. She took my hand and got out of bed, walking to the light of the window. She squinted for a moment, adjusting to the light, and then squeezed my hand.
“It’s beautiful.” She surveyed the roads and driveways covered in snow, the rooftops sparkling in white. I watched her, the moonlight catching her green eyes just right. She ran a hand through her long, brown hair, her fingers getting caught in the tangles at the end. She turned to face me. “Now what?”
“Now what?” I asked. “Now, the world is asleep, and the snow has fallen, and the sky is clear. Now we can do whatever we want.”
She grinned at me, ducking her head and looking down. I put a finger under her chin and lifted her face until her eyes met mine. Her eyes, so calming, so familiar. Not quite bottle green, not quite emerald. They looked like polished jade in the light of the moon, staring right into my soul. I leaned down to kiss her, and she stood on her tiptoes to meet my lips. When we pulled away, I put my hand on her waist, where her white tank top met purple fleece pajama pants, and took her other hand in mine. She placed her hand- freezing cold- on my bare shoulder. And we started to waltz.
“Cliche much, Jefferson?” She asked. I raised an eyebrow in question. “Dancing in the dark with no music?” I let go of her hip, twirling her around, and then pulled her closer so her head rested on my shoulder.
“Then I’ll sing for you,” I whispered into her ear. “And we won’t be dancing without music.”
She pulled away from me, and I twirled her again.
“Oh, Miss Believer, my pretty sleeper…” My voice started off rocky, from singing softly in the middle of the night. I put our hands over our head, pulling us into a cuddle. “Your twisted mind is like snow on the road.” I pulled her back into dance position. She was smiling sheepishly, shaking her head at me. We started to waltz again. “Your shaking shoulders prove that it’s colder inside your head than the winter of dead.” I twirled her again, this time really slow, singing as she walked. “I will tell you…” She finished the turn, looking back up at me, grinning like a fool. She always closed her eyes and looked down when she smiled. I pulled her up to me, our feet touching, her hands on my chest, our faces inches apart. “I love you.” I could feel her heart beating, fast, and there was a slight blush on her cheeks.
“But the muffs on your ears will cater your fears.” I whispered into her ear. I nuzzled her shoulder, kissing her collarbone. “My heart and feet are running as we start…”
“That’s not the words,” She says, her breath tickling my ear, breaking my concentration. She pulled out of the embrace to look at me. “It’s my nose and feet are running.” I sigh over dramatically, faking disappointment. “That’s not romantic, Gwen.” She laughed.
“You’re cute when you pout.” She leaned up and kissed my nose, about the highest place on my face she could reach. “Keep singing.” I smiled.
“As we travel through snow, together we go...”---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Your turn Maddie... good luck.
And to all you Squichy Mushins... thanks for reading!!!
-Lindie Harper
